Wednesday, January 16, 2008

You Got Voicemail

I have heard some pretty crazy voicemails in my calling years and these are just some of the craziest ones i remember...


1. Hello, I am not currently picking up calls because I can not deal with the bullshit that
humans seem to be full of. If you feel like it, leave a message and I just might give you a call
back when I get a better tolerance for the human bullshit, and if I don’t call you back, take
a hint….Beep!


2. Hello, Hello, I can’t hear you…oh hi, wassup? Hold on a sec……..ok, yeah, I just found out I
am not at home so please leave a message at the tone…Beep!


3. Hello, ishyo boi. Do what you do...Beep!


4. Hello, thank you for calling…Jesus loves you very much and he died for all your sins. He
died so you can live so please give your life to him today, he wants you to live eternally and
not perish in hell. Tomorrow may be too late, give your life to him today. If you want to
make this decision today, please join me as we pray, say after me…heavenly father…I come
to you today…I admit that I am a filthy sinner…I confess all of my sins…and I accept you as
my lord and savior… thank you lord for saving me…Amen…Beep!


5. Bless the lord oh my soul and all that is within me, bless his holy name…thank you for
calling…we are not here, leave a message and we will call you back…if we don’t, rapture
probably took place already and you were left behind!!…Beep!

11 comments:

Jayn Sean said...

Bwahahahahaha...but i loved that one. The 2nd last one. About Jesus loving us and dying for our sin. Those are some voicemail messages mennn!

bumight said...

caller ID
#1: psycho
#5: SU

little miss me said...

LMAO at #4..an entire church service in a voicemail message..lol@ #5,i'll be too scared to leave a message after hearing that

Orientatednaijababe said...

Lol!!!Those V.messages r very funny and crazy at the same time...some of them even scared d shit out of me...If these people r ur friends, u seriously need new friends....

Thanks for visiting my blog....cheers

Misan said...

I am CRYING my eyes out from laughing so hard!! Ok, number 1 is simply classic!! hilarious!!

is "ishyo" in #3 meant to be "eesho" (as in ela?)? have never seen that in writing so forgive the slowness.

the last 2 are just plain funny! the people that ACTUALLY let that run on their phones must have another cell for their job, coz really...

SOLOMONSYDELLE said...

hahahaha, the last one was my favorite!

First time here, nice one.

miss hotbody said...

I love it when I pick up very creative voicemails butthey are few and far in between. 9ja people dont have that patience sha, they just switch off when they hear voicemail

InCogNaija said...

@jaybabe, bumight and little miss me: thanks for stopping by.
@ONB:my job involves calling people, thats how i get them. friends ke? my friends r craazy in other things. lmao
@ misan: 'ishyo' is my way of spelling the ebonics version of 'its your'. senior moment fully pardoned. lol!
@solomonsydelle: thanks for stopping by
@miss hotbody:naija pple dont have minutes to waste of those long voicemails.

Semirah said...

Ishyo boy, do ur thing!!! shet mehn...Naia BOYZ!!!..

Naija boy feeling HOT!!!

onydchic said...

The sermon was creepy. How about this one...

Hi. I'm not available right now. But leave a message and send me credit if you want me to call you back.

Nigerians, huh?

I noticed you dropped by, thanks for the stop, visit again! :)

InCogNaija said...

@onydchic: lol@send me credit. shameless begging huh?!