Nice to meet you

I know, i know...everybody claims to be innocent...in the beginning. lol!!
But on the real tho, i am. raised in church, raised to abide by all the rules if not, i answered to the merciless belt of daddy.
my folks were the types that never let anything slide, they saw everything, they knew everything, but why does that not stop a kid from being bad?
Just juvenile folly, i was so bad that my parents figured that the ever so effective nigerian flogging was of no effect with me and they turned to use my mortal fear against me...'stooping down' or 'picking the pin' or 'maize planting' (it is known by many names but the general idea is to bend over and touch the ground with one finger and raise one leg off the ground). the punishment was staying in that position without changing hands(fingers) or switching legs.
My folks knew that i was deathly horrified by the thought of stooping down. I was no punk as a kid, you could tell me you will flog 'shege'(the hell) out of me and i will be fazed none, but the moment i hear "go and stoop down dia" i just start crying and basically beg for a whooping instead. After i figured that they knew my mortal fear and were ready to use that against me to the max, guess what i went and did...
i started practicing stooping down when they go out. perfected the art of stooping down so that when they said "go and stoop down dia" i am like " itz all good" and i will be balanced for long enough to get my dad frustrated(cos he always sat beside me and it was xmas for him when i faltered or stumbled, he will use that as an excuse to flog me and send me back to the position). Believe me it felt good to get him frustrated at his own game... however, like i said earlier, I am an innocent naija boy, been that way since...since Idi-amin ruled naija. lmao!!! yup, nice to meet you too.